Cari Cole
Do You Flutter?
Do you flutter back and forth? When you think of yourself on that stage at Madison Square Garden, do you get really nervous? Or is it a combination? Do you get really nervous and also really excited? Do you think "Oh I can't wait for that to happen" – and then you think "I wonder if that will ever happen?"
This sort of back and forth thing I call the 'Flutter'. And sometimes over confidence is really masking that deeper insecurity you don't even want to admit to yourself.
It’s Common Knowledge
I've been writing about how artists are all wounded; well, they mostly are. I'd like this to be common knowledge so that artists can start to realize it and understand it’s part of the dynamic of being an artist. And when people start to identify their real honest true fears and not judge themselves for it, it opens the possibility of moving beyond the fears – beyond the wounding. That's the thing; if you can stay open and not judge yourself, you can actually start to dissolve your fears.
Work Your Confidence as Your Face Your Fears
So I ask you to look honestly at these questions and answer them for yourself:
- How much do you really believe that you can make it?
- Do you suffer from a deep down lack of confidence or self-esteem – maybe not on the surface, but if you really look at it, how much do you really believe in yourself?
And I want you to know that these are 2 different questions.
Making it in the music industry is kind of about your connections – to yourself and others – and about a lot of other things that form your inner resolve or inner confidence.
You can work on your confidence as you face your fears. You can work on your connections and ways into the music industry. You have to learn to tackle each one – separately – and together – to find your way as an artist.
The truth is: Most artists, being the sensitive perfectionist's that they are, tend to suffer from the pressures of performing – and it has nothing to do with how talented they are. Often the more talented an artist is – the more they suffer. One's psychological attitude can have a big influence over that. Over 20+ years of coaching artists, I’ve found several ways to help singers cope with stage fright – solutions that can turn things around rather quickly in some cases. From homeopathic solutions to setting personal goals (and not thinking about your audience) to changing one's attitude about performing, there are solutions to be found.
Fear and Anxiety about Performing are Natural Emotions
There is fear and anxiety about performing and then there is stage fright. Stage fright is when you are absolutely terrified of the stage and have not performed much. It also has to do with low self esteem or too high of a bar that you set for yourself. Perfectionists suffer more than others. In most cases I also find that musicians/artists who have stage fright are often under prepared in their craft.
Fear and anxiety about performing are natural emotions that come to performing artists and vary in relation to how important the performance is. If it's your television debut, it's going to be tougher going than if you've had several performances on the tube. A competition tends to make singers more nervous than if they are simply performing their own material before an audience – especially an audience who already loves them and is coming to see them. You can see how different situations will ramp up the nerves more than others.
Fear and anxiety about performing are natural emotions that come to performing artists and vary in relation to how important the performance is. If it's your television debut, it's going to be tougher going than if you've had several performances on the tube. A competition tends to make singers more nervous than if they are simply performing their own material before an audience – especially an audience who already loves them and is coming to see them. You can see how different situations will ramp up the nerves more than others.
Solutions for Stage Fright
Here's what you can do to make yourself more comfortable and use the nerves instead of them working against you.
1. Don't fight it!
The main thing to understand is that all performers experience pre-performance jitters. Anyone that tells you otherwise is fibbing. : ) Performers are nervous because they care! Funny fact – the better the performer – sometimes the more nerves! So – Don't fight it – you can actually use the energy better if you don't fight the feelings. "What you resist persists"... The heightened nerves, fast pulse, and shallow breath are the feeling of adrenalin moving through you. Adrenalin provides you with the extra energy you need to perform. Notice also how it's a similar sensation to being excited and jumping for joy (try to remember that next time you have the jitters). So don't fight it – rather try to view it as excitement. Remember it's there to serve you. But you'll have to get a hold of your breath - read on...
2. Deep breathing
The first thing to go when you have nerves is your breath. So in the moments before performance – breathe deeply into your diaphragm. Visualize it dropping way down (along with your larynx) every time you inhale. This will keep you from having that squeaky sound that comes from shallow breath and a high larynx.
1. Don't fight it!
The main thing to understand is that all performers experience pre-performance jitters. Anyone that tells you otherwise is fibbing. : ) Performers are nervous because they care! Funny fact – the better the performer – sometimes the more nerves! So – Don't fight it – you can actually use the energy better if you don't fight the feelings. "What you resist persists"... The heightened nerves, fast pulse, and shallow breath are the feeling of adrenalin moving through you. Adrenalin provides you with the extra energy you need to perform. Notice also how it's a similar sensation to being excited and jumping for joy (try to remember that next time you have the jitters). So don't fight it – rather try to view it as excitement. Remember it's there to serve you. But you'll have to get a hold of your breath - read on...
2. Deep breathing
The first thing to go when you have nerves is your breath. So in the moments before performance – breathe deeply into your diaphragm. Visualize it dropping way down (along with your larynx) every time you inhale. This will keep you from having that squeaky sound that comes from shallow breath and a high larynx.
3. Self talk
The way you talk to yourself in your head in the weeks, days, and hours before a performance make an effect on what you will experience. If you are constantly rehearsing mistakes happening in your head - guess what? It turns out that what we concentrate on tends to happen. Try walking down the street saying to yourself over and over "I'm going to trip, I'm afraid I'm going to trip" and see if it doesn't come true. Ironically the performer thinks they are preparing themselves better by thoroughly examining what "could" go wrong; however it only makes you focus on what you don't want. The best way to turn that around is to catch that voice in your head when it comes and replace those thoughts with positive affirming ones. Remind yourself of all the good qualities about you as a performer, how hard you work, and how you want to enjoy the chance to get up on stage and share your love of music and singing with your audience. Pump yourself up – not down! Keep up the positive feedback all the way through your performance and see if it doesn't go much better. If you have a hard time staying focused – meditate more to strengthen your powers of concentration.
4. Homeopathic remedies
Homeopathic remedies can work really beautifully. They are strong enough to have an effect but not too strong to cause other unwanted side effects like dryness or slowing down your heart rate. [Remedies like beta-blockers slow your heart-rate and make for a dull performance – while swiggin' whiskey or brandy may make you feel better, but tends to make your voice sound drunk and dry. A swig of white wine is better if you must have some alcohol.] When I have an extra bit of nerves going on, I occasionally use the homeopathic remedy "gelsemium sempervirens" which works great for pre-performance butterflies. Homeopathy has very specific symptoms to diagnosis which remedy to use. To find out which one would be perfect for you, search Google for a homeopathic site that you can plug in your symptoms.
5. Set a personal goal for each performance
If your focus is on your audience – you might as well throw in the towel – you will be worried about whether they are liking the show and that will pull you out of the focus you need to perform well. Ever watched someone perform who seemed nervous? Were they enjoying themselves? We want performers to relax and just do their thing while we watch them. I've learned that setting a personal goal makes it much easier for me to focus on the right things.
The way you talk to yourself in your head in the weeks, days, and hours before a performance make an effect on what you will experience. If you are constantly rehearsing mistakes happening in your head - guess what? It turns out that what we concentrate on tends to happen. Try walking down the street saying to yourself over and over "I'm going to trip, I'm afraid I'm going to trip" and see if it doesn't come true. Ironically the performer thinks they are preparing themselves better by thoroughly examining what "could" go wrong; however it only makes you focus on what you don't want. The best way to turn that around is to catch that voice in your head when it comes and replace those thoughts with positive affirming ones. Remind yourself of all the good qualities about you as a performer, how hard you work, and how you want to enjoy the chance to get up on stage and share your love of music and singing with your audience. Pump yourself up – not down! Keep up the positive feedback all the way through your performance and see if it doesn't go much better. If you have a hard time staying focused – meditate more to strengthen your powers of concentration.
4. Homeopathic remedies
Homeopathic remedies can work really beautifully. They are strong enough to have an effect but not too strong to cause other unwanted side effects like dryness or slowing down your heart rate. [Remedies like beta-blockers slow your heart-rate and make for a dull performance – while swiggin' whiskey or brandy may make you feel better, but tends to make your voice sound drunk and dry. A swig of white wine is better if you must have some alcohol.] When I have an extra bit of nerves going on, I occasionally use the homeopathic remedy "gelsemium sempervirens" which works great for pre-performance butterflies. Homeopathy has very specific symptoms to diagnosis which remedy to use. To find out which one would be perfect for you, search Google for a homeopathic site that you can plug in your symptoms.
5. Set a personal goal for each performance
If your focus is on your audience – you might as well throw in the towel – you will be worried about whether they are liking the show and that will pull you out of the focus you need to perform well. Ever watched someone perform who seemed nervous? Were they enjoying themselves? We want performers to relax and just do their thing while we watch them. I've learned that setting a personal goal makes it much easier for me to focus on the right things.
I set goals like:
a. "I want to feel good in the hour before, during, and after my performance. This night is for me". That way I don't focus on who is coming, or what people will think. This is just one of the many "self talk" sentences I run through my head – Get creative!
b. Here's another one that also speaks to that: "I am going to focus on the ‘music’ and not the audience". This is a big goal that most folks overlook. This doesn't mean you don't perform to the audience – of course you do. You have to look outwards and project energy out to them. What I mean here is that while you are performing, your inner dialogue is on the music – not the audience's reaction. The music is there to carry you, if you let it. Just relax into the beautiful sounds and the musicians – or just you and your guitar. Make it feel good to you –and it will feel good to us.
c. Sometimes I use this one if I am going to be performing (auditioning) for a few people or in an intimate space where I can see everyone (versus a large stage where you can't see anyone through the lights). "This performance is about connecting deeply to my lyrics and allowing my voice to shine by making everything that comes out of my mouth feel good to me".
a. "I want to feel good in the hour before, during, and after my performance. This night is for me". That way I don't focus on who is coming, or what people will think. This is just one of the many "self talk" sentences I run through my head – Get creative!
b. Here's another one that also speaks to that: "I am going to focus on the ‘music’ and not the audience". This is a big goal that most folks overlook. This doesn't mean you don't perform to the audience – of course you do. You have to look outwards and project energy out to them. What I mean here is that while you are performing, your inner dialogue is on the music – not the audience's reaction. The music is there to carry you, if you let it. Just relax into the beautiful sounds and the musicians – or just you and your guitar. Make it feel good to you –and it will feel good to us.
c. Sometimes I use this one if I am going to be performing (auditioning) for a few people or in an intimate space where I can see everyone (versus a large stage where you can't see anyone through the lights). "This performance is about connecting deeply to my lyrics and allowing my voice to shine by making everything that comes out of my mouth feel good to me".
Best of luck!
In love and support,
This article is reprinted with the permission of Cari Cole. Cari Cole is a renowned vocal coach, artist development expert, songwriter & music producer. She helps artists find their voice, craft their style, and create successful music careers. Cari’s client list includes Grammy winners, American Idol finalists, legendary rock stars, Major & Indie label artists and thousands of aspiring & emerging artists. Her Singer’s Gift Vocal series is foundational for pop and rock vocalists. To find out about Cari’s products and programs, please visit her information-packed website and blog: www.caricole.com.
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